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Soo.. How is YOUR living situation going? ;) - The Core Sample

About Soo.. How is YOUR living situation going? ;)

Previous Entry Soo.. How is YOUR living situation going? ;) Nov. 19th, 2005 @ 10:17 pm Next Entry
I can only qualify this by saying that I have had some of the best roommates ever as well. I've had roommates that I woke up at three o' clock in the morning to tell them about my night, housemates that threw a birthday party for me after I had moved out, harmoniously shared a townhouse with a girl that helped teach me to climb, and lived with sweethearts that drove me places or shared stories and food.



BUT

Details about people's living situations are always given out enthusiastically in September. However, close to Christmas, the fun begins ;) No matter how well people get along, in the close days of winter, there isn't a person I know that lives with others that doesn't have a storehouse of annoying behaviours to relate.

It has gotten particularly interesting this year. One of my friends can't handle how territorial her roommate is being. "I thought we had a lot in common because we had really similar life experiences, but we're very different people," she lamented a couple of days ago. "A. seems to think that she is just a better person than me," she continued. "I borrowed a cup of milk from her, told her about it and replaced it with the entire container. When I got back, she had already bought milk and said she didn't want it. She told me that she didn't use my stuff, so she expected that I wouldn't use any of her stuff again. I mean, I replaced it almost right away with almost three times as much. What kind of person is that?"

I went straight from that conversation to another girlfriend's house. "What's that smell?" I asked cautiously upon walking in. There was a musty scent to the place.

"It smells like-" our other friend wrinkled her nose.

"It smells like boy" the girl who lived there interrupted accusingly. "See? You guys smell it, too! My whole house smells like boys," she said, gesturing and shaking her head.

"Actually it smells like stale pee," said our other friend. The moment she said it, the smell made sense.

"Oh my god. I don't even know where it is coming from. The place is supposed to be clean," said the resident girl, shaking her head. It did look clean. We cased out the house, sniffing. The smell was coming from one of the boys' rooms, we realized after half an hour. The room was full of gear for sports which obviously was, well, stinking.

The other day someone had spilt something in the fridge and the roommates had to have an immediate meeting to deal with the chaos. Unfortunately one of them was holed up in a room with his girlfriend and wasn't too happy about having to march down the stairs to cries of: "Will you please deal with this?" Two of them ganged up on him to drag him to the fridge cleaning session.

"Honestly, its such a gong show," the girl roommate sighed. And one of the guys kept eating her food. It was really disrespectful. But the other guy wasn't perfect either: "X ate my organic salsa," she said. "I mean, he has crappy no name salsa from Safeway. How do you confuse that will six dollar a bottle salsa? Ugh. And he told me that I could have his cheap stuff instead."

This is all predictable, but really amusing if you're not living with these people. Keep in mind that all of these people have gotten along fairly well most of the time, and were very into each other in September.

I've been there. I've had good roommates and bad, and basically nothing about a person actually prepares you to live with them. Some of my best roommates have been people that I would never have met in so-called "real life".

Anyway, none of these minor dramas top what happened last year, when my friend Ryan had this roommate that he had a "neutral at best" relationship with. Things were going along all right, when he arrived home to find an eviction notice on his door. He had three days to pack up and leave. What was going on? He lay in wait for his roommate only to find out that he had apparently stolen the roomie's very distinctive socks. "But these are my socks," Ryan protested. "My mom gave them to me for Christmas."

The socks were very expensive and only one store in Victoria carried them. It wasn't possible, apparently, for Ryan to have the same pair.

This debacle resulted in Ryan actually having to phone his mother up-island so that she could confirm to his roommate that she had indeed purchased this exact pair of socks for Ryan. Only then was the eviction rescinded. The frazzled roommate had been so angry that his face had turned red and now he had apparently somehow lost his supersocks into the bargain. The entire event resulted in my christening him "Sockzilla" and this has become the primary mode of reference when anyone in our circle occasionally remembers him.

He and Ryan continued with fairly tenuous relations for the rest of the year until they both moved, but not without some final accusatory debates over people's damage deposits.. just to sum the whole mess up :)

I don't want to exempt myself from roommate messes either, because that just wouldn't be fair, so here's the dish:) When I was in second year of university, one of my climbing partners decided that he liked me. Rather than address it directly, this guy for some odd reason got one of his women friends to actually move in with me (since he knew that we were both looking for roommates) and then proceeded to come over all the time. What ended up happening but that the girl, who had a long distance boyfriend, fell for him and then invented a boyfriend that I didn't tell people about. She asked me to put a picture of myself in the main room that had me chatting away with a guy (a foreign student from Germany), and this guy became the secret boyfriend. So secret that even I didn't know about him ;)

I didn't figure out what had happened until I heard about my so-called boyfriend from someone a couple of months later: "..but wasn't he that guy in that picture with you in your living room? X. told us all that you guys were dating but keeping it private..." and by then this enterprising chick had already moved out with some of my stuff.

Ahhh.. Roommates. Can't live with them.. but wait.. you are...
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From:lostwanderfound
Date:November 20th, 2005 03:54 am (UTC)
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If you can find it over there, I heartily recommend a book called He Died with a Felafel in his Hand.

Outrageously funny, and the perfect documentary of sharehouse life; everything in this book has happened to me at one time or another.
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From:lostwanderfound
Date:November 20th, 2005 03:38 pm (UTC)
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Incidentally, while we're sharing flatmate-from-hell stories, I:

* Had a flatmate chase her boyfriend around the loungeroom with a carving knife before she ran out into the street, got hit by a car, disappeared for three days then wandered back into the house pretending nothing had happened;

* Had a flatmate steal the rent money, spend it on drugs, attempt to frame someone else for the theft, accuse us of victimising her when we told her to move out because of this, then come back and burgle the house (getting about half of my music collection in the process, much of it irreplacable) when we didn't change the locks quickly enough (the ex-flatmate of the previous anecdote had let her know that we were going to be out of town for the weekend...).
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From:nightshine
Date:November 23rd, 2005 09:48 pm (UTC)
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I have two other bad stories as well (I've lived with a lot of people)- but nothing so extreme :)

Your stories are creepy! I once lent money to someone that was a recovered drug addict, and it turned out later that he had relapsed. I can't even imagine living with one. The person also took off with his roommate's rent, which was sad for everyone involved.
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From:nightshine
Date:November 23rd, 2005 09:38 pm (UTC)
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I looked it up :) I am designing a site for my web design class for new first year students, and I am going to put a link to it on the site. Hopefully I get the chance to sit down with a copy sometime soon as well. I'll let you know if I do :)
From:sohwhat
Date:November 20th, 2005 07:13 am (UTC)
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that sockzilla story is the best! i can't believe how nutso some people are.

i honestly have the best roommate in the world right now. which i know because i'm a *terrible* roommate, and she's put up with me for 2 years.
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From:nightshine
Date:November 23rd, 2005 09:54 pm (UTC)

=)

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You're really lucky.. good roommates sometimes take a while to find. Its kind of like panning for gold.

Yes, the sockzilla story is pretty hilarious. I don't know what else was going on there, but what an extremist! thankfully things improved for him after he moved out of there- his roommates for the next year were excellent :)
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From:russkiypenguin
Date:November 20th, 2005 08:27 am (UTC)
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and some people wonder why I live alone.

I once lost a house. literally. a whole fucking house to a foreclosure over letting a cokehead cousin buy it with me. I tried renting it out for a while and still kept losing money on it. I finally gave up after one of the idiots that I had rented it to(I used a property manager who was reputable to find the guy) abused one of his daughter's friends.

then there was the guy who's sister I was dating that moved in with me. he'd pay rent on time some of the time. then he'd use my computer all the friggin time. got absolutely flaming mad when I finally moved it into my bedroom. then got screaming mad when I told him that at the end of the lease I was moving and didn't want him to come with me. I don't really understand why people attach themselves to me. I don't like it and it never seems to turn out well.

Anyhow, I hate roommates for most of the reasons you've listed. I do however miss the strange relationships that would pop up from two different cliques merging for parties and such. That doesn't seem to happy as much once you grow older.
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From:nightshine
Date:November 23rd, 2005 09:58 pm (UTC)
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your cousin was a cokehead? good grief, how stressful. it just sucks when you're in partnership with someone who is that vulnerable. they obviously can't make you one of their main priorities, because the drugs are always at the top. i'm surprised by the number of people that have had druggie roommates. i guess that i've been lucky in that regard, although this is not to say that i haven't had a couple of 'off' living situations- i really think everyone has.
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From:russkiypenguin
Date:November 25th, 2005 03:04 am (UTC)
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yeah, I knew he loved weed before I made my decision. The further addictions only showed up after the fact. and unfortunately it's not that he was a cokehead. he is a cokehead.
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From:pash29
Date:November 20th, 2005 10:34 am (UTC)
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I can so relate to this phenomena. Everything seems good, and then...My roomates now are pretty cool and respectful people. A is the youngest, just inher third year of uni. An art student. She hoards her dishes in her room until the end of the week when she washes them, which is alright since the rest of us don't have to see them. But strangely, when she makes toast she scatters crumbs over the entire counter and leaves her peanut-buttery knife there in the middle of the crumb minefield. I *always* end up braking down and cleaning it, because nobody else seems to notice. But she does share her mandarin oranges with me...The two guys are very quiet most of the time. No complaints there really. It's an exceptionally good situation, given we didn't know each other before we moved in and we are all committed to staying until the end of our lease in the summer.

I had a roomate once who was on welfare and who constantly would accuse me and my boyfriend of things like stealing her peanut butter and her 'yellow comb.' She would then eat our organic food and sometimes replace it with non-organic. She wanted us to be all sharing with the food thing, but when someone is in a different SES than you are it's difficult to agree on what to buy, so we said just keep things separate. Well, she had some mental problems too I suspect. Anyhow, it's always some kind of compromise sharing living space with someone.
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From:nightshine
Date:November 23rd, 2005 10:04 pm (UTC)
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Haha, you're like the classic live-alone person, so I was curious to see what you might have to say on this topic. I just cannot picture someone accusing you of stealing..that's got to suck ;) Its just pretty amusing to me because you are among one of the most trustworthy people I know. (Nice story, though.) AND, I agree with our discussion when you left- we would have been good roommates :) But I'm glad that you've entered what sounds like a fairly harmonious situation right now. And your rent is cheaper, too. Good for you!
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From:7ghent
Date:November 20th, 2005 01:23 pm (UTC)
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Man, I hear that. The best roommate I've ever had got us evicted by bouncing a rent check. I was out of town at the time and returned with 8 hours to move all of my stuff out.

Other roommate problems mostly revolve around cleaning and cats and not cleaning up after cats.

I currently live alone in a 750 sq foot house in the University area. I've got an 8-foot block fence topped with barbed wire, lots of trees, grapevines, bamboo and a bomb shelter. It's a weird little place, but I like it.
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From:nightshine
Date:November 23rd, 2005 10:06 pm (UTC)
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Yeah, I live alone too. I've had a girlfriend coming over to use the internet and shower, because she was on a boat and her generator blew, but things are cool for her now. I've got a lot of people in my life- so far I haven't had that "so alone" feeling. Your place sounds nice.. the bomb shelter made me laugh. Is it from WW2 or something? :)
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From:7ghent
Date:November 24th, 2005 12:50 am (UTC)
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More cold-war era. But yeah, it's fairly cool. Occasionally it gets a little too empty, mostly due to the fact that I haven't ever lived alone and been single simultaneously. But mostly, it's pretty good.
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From:michika
Date:November 20th, 2005 04:45 pm (UTC)
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Oh roommates...so special...

I would comment but I'm afraid that my experiences will scar your readers...

Thanks for giving me a laugh this evening!
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From:nightshine
Date:November 23rd, 2005 10:08 pm (UTC)
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You just should not have roommates. You need time to get over the ones that you have had, and to get on with your life. And that's all I am going to say on that subject! much love..
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From:michika
Date:November 24th, 2005 08:07 am (UTC)
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I totally agree with you. We're for sure selling the house this summer, hopefully things will get back to normal after that!
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